Teresa Bejan (2006)
Teresa Mia Bejan was once poised for opera greatness when, tragically, she was sidelined with a pulled hamstring in the fourth quarter. Now she fills the void left by shattered dreams singing on various monosyllables--she likes "bah" an awful lot, but is willing to experiment--and arranging her favorite hits for a cappella, only to be met with incredulous looks by Ivan. A member of the Oxford Alternotives while studying abroad, she misses them desperately, but is happy to be safely ensconced once more in VIYH's ample bosom. In her spare time, she likes to lament the fact that she has no spare time. She also enjoys disinfecting countertops and Alfred Hitchcock.